Keep Your Melon UV Free, While Sipping On A Cool Sea Breeze

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I can’t lie, I fucking LOVE seeing chicks in beanies during the summer with like, short shorts and mad 'Preme. I tried to pull off the beanie in the summer maneuver this one time, but my noggin was steamier than a Mexican clown car. Gross, I know. Thankfully, Beams Plus has these linen/cotton blend caps so I can throw one on and prowl the streets, keeping an eye out for my true beanie soulmate goth bitch. I’m pretty sure you could even wear one of these to the beach if you were, like, wild stupid. I can picture some of you keeping your melon UV free, while sipping on a cool sea breeze. Disclaimer: We are in no way shape or form responsible for your heat stroke. Don’t be a fucking idiot and realize most of this satire, homes. It’s all fun and games until some art school chick comes into the comment section basically trying to levy a lawsuit against ya boy.

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