Design Taxi is out here doing god's work, letting us know about world shattering innovations like the FlaskTie and it's new counterpart, the FlaskScarf. What is a FlaskScarf, you ask? Well, you must be a real dumb fuck because it's exactly what it sounds like: Some dudes decided to put those CamelBak joints hippies wear when they hike the Appalachian Trail inside of a scarf. Are there seriously people out there that are this bad at being alcoholics in public? You know what you do if you need to drink a bunch of booze around a bunch of lames? YOU COP A BIG GULP FROM 7-ELEVEN AND YOU FILL IT UP WITH 32 OUNCES OF BAD DECISION JUICE. Then, when you drink, it just looks like you're drinking a giant ass soda, arguably worse for your health than a few cold ones btw. And, I'm all for that somewhat anachronistic method instead of, you know, LOOKING LIKE YOU'RE SUCKING ON YOUR FUCKING TIE OR SCARF LIKE A ORALLY FIXATED WEIRDO. It's secret flasks like these and G Pens that are ruining America's youth. You motherfuckers are so goddamn spoiled.
