#KOBE #LEBRON #BROWNS

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I don't know anything about basketball, but it's probably the one sport you American fuckheads thought up that isn't totally and utterly wack. Maybe that's because it's so close in premise to soccer. I mean, there's a ball and the whole points is to get said ball to go into, like, a metal construct. And that metal construct has a net attached to it. There are also men running around and lines on the floor that serve as boundaries you must keep the ball within. I believe basketball also has referees.

But yeah, apparently Kobe LeBron joined the Cleveland Browns this week, so I'm gonna try and ride the social media wave a lil if you'll bear with me for a second. #KOBE. #LEBRON. #BROWNS. Thanks.

Upon first viewing, I was under the impression this was a photograph of a some ancient religious artifact, but I've since been given assurances that it is in fact a basketball—one similar in size, shape and function to the one Prince James will use upon his return to the Miami Dolphins.

Time to face the music, you're probably not very good at sports, and that's fine. When you bring them girlies over to your pad and this thing is proudly displayed on your mantlepiece, you can lie to them and say you won it captaining your high school basketball team to the Junior League Superbowl Championship trophy.

Moksha August is a serial Four Pins commenter turned writer. I guess you could say that he started from the bottom. Haha, that's the spot. You can follow him on Twitter here.

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