Hey you! Yeah, you, in the cubicle, with the Cheetos dust all over that Margiela fisherman sweater. You hate your job. Don’t try to tell me you like being Associate Researcher for Spreadsheet Efficiency, filling every Excel cell with each letter of the alphabet for some idiot boss named Steve who smells like Polo Blue by Ralph Lauren and calls you “Chumpy”. I know how to get you out. Let's explore.
Rachel Seville is a writer living in New York who believes in miracles. Read her blog, Pizza Rulez, here and follow her on Twitter here.
1. guidetoquitting
2. dontquit
3. meaningfulpetproject
4. meaninglesspetproject
5. createafakename
6. commandh
7. demoralizingprobono
8. lookforanewjob
9. network
10. buildupprojects
11. bepatient
12. ehquit
Okay, Time To Quit
But if things get really miserable, you’ve got all those bones saved up (remember slide 1?) and maybe it’d be a better use of your time to make use of your (newly established, you're welcome) network for a job. Maybe you’ve even got enough Pro Bono or Anti The Edge work that you’ve even built up a name for yourself and you can coast on that until you find something more permanent. (That being said, it’s much easier to find a job when you already have one, so please be wise.) If you’re gonna do it, really do it. Look up important speeches, like maybe the Gettysburg Address or a soliloquy from Office Space or the part in Never Been Kissed when Drew Barrymore is like, “I’m an undercover reporter, stop covering me in dog food,” and use that as a template to have the greatest moment of corporate oration of your entire life. Your new life without health insurance starts ToMoRrOwwwwW!