This Is What The Average American Male Looks Like

Ever wonder why you have to size up when you order clothes from Japan? It couldn't possibly be the roughly 250 NBA players influencing the sizing scale for the rest of us, could it? Do we all just like to wear our clothes baggy as shit? Are Japanese dudes not drinking their milk? NOPE. In a study that should surprise no one, it's simply that we're all disgusting fat fucks, while other countries are, you know, not. I'm not saying YOU specifically are a fat fuck (even though statistically speaking, you probably are), but collectively, yeah, we're all fat fucks, and the numbers don't lie. Through CDC data—the motherfucking Center For Disease Control is now studying our fat asses because that's how rough shit is out here—James Hamlin and Nickolay Lamm have rendered graphics of what the average American male looks like and—SPOILER ALERT—he looks fat as fuck. Ya boy's name is Todd (seriously), he has a BMI of 29 (one point shy of being considered "technically obese") and his waist is an impressive 39 inches. Japan, The Netherlands and France, for comparison, have BMI averages of 23.7, 25.2 and 25.6 respectively.

Basically what this means for us here at Four Pins, is that Todd can't buy any of the clothes we write about. His body looks like one of those menswear dogs who thinks he's into style, but just shops at J.Crew and buys shit that is way to small, while the entire time trying to convince people it's just a "tailored fit". But really, don't feel too bad Todd, because no one, skinny or fat, can afford most of the things we write about anyway.

No, but really, this is pretty disgusting. Let's all agree to hit the gym tonight okay, bros?