So, This Is What He Masturbates To

This book is by Claiborne Swanson Frank. If that name alone doesn’t garner, like, at least three purchases I don’t know what to think anymore. You know with a name like that this book basically boils down to really pretty women photographed really well. And this book just so happens to be full of American women. When a girl finally comes over to your place, this book will throw her for a loop. First, because it’s called American Beauty, she’ll think you are just super into Kevin Spacy and Mena Suvari's tits and rogue plastic bags. Then she’ll open it up and be like, “So, this is what he masturbates to.” At least she didn’t find that hidden folder on your computer. PASSWORD PROTECTION, SON. ALWAYS.