The 15 Skirt-Approved Men’s Grooming Products You Need Right Now

If the clothes maketh the man, beauty products maketh the gods. Yes, folks, that’s truly the thin line between the well-dressed serf and guys flanked by winged, trumpet-playing babies: a glowing complexion, velveteen skin and a radiant beard that sits indomitable like Moses’s burning bush just moments before its celestial combustion.

Stay away from beauty products and remain merely mortal. Add too many to your regimen and you’re in a Fall Out Boy music video that parodies Some Like It Hot (sidenote: someone do that). It seems men can’t win!!!!!!! The trick is to find products that enhance your natural masculinity without playing anything up, which sounds maybe like copy for a Viagra ad, so let me just say that I have found 15 beauty products that will make your life better and are totally OK to wear according to a woman and that woman is me. If you don’t like the word "beauty", then fine, "grooooommmiiiingggg products," you big baby.

I haven’t tested any of these because, if you did not know, I am a woman. But I have seen them in the bathroom cabinets of some of our country’s finest men; witnessed them on the faces of some of the proudest underachieving heroes who my mom sort of liked and my dad thought were total “nimrods.” And that, my friends, is what counts as a ringing endorsement, at least on the Internet, where the standards are low and the slideshows are long. Chuck out that gel deodorant and Head & Shoulders, ‘cause we’re about to go straight Groomswear.

Rachel Seville is a writer living in New York who believes in miracles. Read her blog, Pizza Rulez, here and follow her on Twitter here.

  • Andy

    On the really real, though, Rachel. How would you feel if you found anti-shine powder in a man’s bathroom, or worse, in his bag/murse?

    • Rachel Seville

      Super alone :(

  • Murph

    Best writer on the site

    • dringle

      Faint praise but yeah she is.

    • Tim

      this is true.

  • Vincent Marjes
    • Rachel Seville

      This looks like it is made for AMA-approved motorcycle gangs and that’s pretty cool.

      • Randy Lai

        Formulated by Australian barbers for Australian barbers, and obviously guys with waxed facial ticklers..

  • queb

    No mention of Ursa Major, which is like the best shit ever. Definitely my favorite when it comes to shaving products. Pretty expensive though.

    • Evan Carlson

      Ursa Major is on point, very surprised not to see them in this list.

  • SC

    Concealer, anti-shine powder, no.

  • Geoffrey

    1 the old spice bottle looks like milk

    2 smell trader joe’s lemon verbena soap

    smells yummy

  • pick a name they said

    I don’t know why i spend 2-3$ on burt’s bee’s chap stick , but i do.

  • Logan Williams

    I just wish you’d leave Brian from IT alone. He’s got his issues he has to deal with, but don’t we all? OK maybe we don’t ALL like to wear dessous under those double-pleated corduroys, but that’s his thing…

  • booboobb

    FOR REAL FOR REAL that ren aftershave really is amazing. if u a big shaver def recommend

  • merg

    fucking brian..

  • hrubio

    I was down with all of this up until that last one. I let Anthony handle that logistic as well, with their Instant Fix Oil Control lotion. This stuff could have solved that little accident BP had in no time, and you won’t have to worry about explaining to Brian in IT that, “Nah dude, it’s cool. Some chick on the Internet said it was okay,” when he catches you powdering your nose in the bathroom.