Defining Menswear

Hey guys, I like clothes. A lot. Like I will die for them shits, OK? So it really fucking irks me when I see some of you motherfuckers masturbatorily waxing poetic about some dope garm and you can't express your inner GQ feelings correctly. I can figuratively see your white suburban buttholes puckering at the thought of condemnation for misusing a great term from the menswear and/or Ebonical dictionary (apparently they are synonymous now, but don't get me started with that because I'll start another L.A. race riot). Or you're just simply using a really fucking stupid one. Loosen that bootyhole up, young buck because I've got some words of wisdom for your bitch ass. Here is a list of said words and phrases we may or may not use everyday, along with my definition of them shits, which should be taken as absolute doctrine. And if all else fails, toss a "mad" before these words and "breh" at the end of your sentences and you're practically on the same level as ya boy.

17 Responses to “Defining Menswear”

  1. ENDO-Mike

    Great article Nick. The kerning on those words was tight as fuck too. You thought non one would notice? Wrong. 😉

  2. Tjay

    I’m taking that Hipster definition and showing it to my friends at my high school who rock 2x oversized blazers for picture day with Polo tennis shoes or Macy’s loafers. Making fun of my premature sartorial swag and shit. Nick done got me hype off this, son. Good stuff.

  3. RobInc

    The word “Jawn” (or “Jawnz” as you wrote) is an OLD Philly term to describe any person, place, event, or thing. I appreciate the commentary on the other terms, “Avant-Garde” is a part of my lexicon, but your “Jawnz” as “Jeans” is just ill-informed.

    • daniel

      true, and, the only folks who use jawn around here anymore are old black dudes and hipsters.

  4. Elvisio

    this new vocabulary should serve me well as i finish my dissertation on the topic of how to make everyone hate you while they simultaneously scurry out to buy whatever shit you’re advertising for. many thanks.

  5. Elvisio

    also, this is sort of like an nba basketball player telling people that since playing basketball is his livelihood people should cut it out with those pick-up games at the local ymca. i.e., stupid.

  6. Andrew

    This is hilarious!!! Isn’t “jawn” a take on “joint”, similar to Memphis’ “junt” and DC “jont”?

  7. prematuresprezzulation


    Could you other four pins/complex authors (talking to you Jian) stop using the race card as your main form of rhetoric. Its just a weak argument. I dont care if your black, or white, Filipino, or half asian, I’m more worried that you cover topics I’m interested in (you do) and also know how to write (?). The idea that caucasians cant get down with your ebonical vocabulary (im from the Bay), but you can misuse of Jawnz, and the fact that you think you even grace the idea of Sprezzatura is laughable. My sun kissed Italian ass, got its bronze on the Amalfi coast, and for your information Sprezz is donned at birth, it can not be bought. Neither is it equivalent to “swag”. Anyway pasty white buttonholes aside, I think hipster was spot on.


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