The Products We Want To Exist In 2014

It is now the year 2014. Weed is basically legal, sweatpants are high-fashion and nachos are now being sold as a self-contained unit. Laziness has become society's most valued trait. But I’m not complaining. Ya boy been lazy. However, there are still tasks in my life that require motion. Not all stairs have been converted to escalators. I can’t even get Taco Bell delivered to my house. It's hard out here and there is progress yet to be made. So, here’s a few products I’m going to need the engineering nerds of 2014 to 3D print out of their collective butthole ASAP.

Angelo Spagnolo is a writer living in Portland, Oregon. Read his blog here and follow him on Twitter here.

  • Peter

    sometimes when i read these articles i fart and smell them afterwards and realize that i rather smell fart than read this shit.

    • Dr. Steve

      ur fat

  • U ain’t GWOP

    This is exactly the reason why I read four-pins religiously.

  • Carlo
  • connor

    stoners best list ever

  • GEB

    Man, mattress cupholders. I can’t believe those haven’t been invented yet. That’s genius.

  • Yvette

    Excellent list! The Oculus VR Rift will be here, most definitely!

  • ポケモントレーナー

    Nike Mags can’t happen i don’t see it being publicly available like that for everyone

    hover-boards HAHAHAHAHAHA wait till 2050 and the next CES

  • Kanye east

    MedBox is a company who creates vending machines for weed….Your Welcome

  • Deaunte

    There’s weed vending machines here in LA already


  • disqus_D2zP4p2LEr

    lmao scarfkins smhhh adult wheelies haahha too good too good

  • kyler

    I have a beard chia